Random Thoughts on Clouds


I’ve never understood people’s fascination with clouds. In clear blue skies, they’re billowy-white. On rainy days, they blend in with the gray slate of the sky. It sucks that the last thing I’m going to see on this earth is a frickin’ puffy cloud shaped like a duck, floating directly overhead.

Where are the cops when you need them? On T.V., a guy gets T-boned in the middle of an intersection and 50 people rush to his aid. So why am I laying here, broken and bleeding, numb from the neck down, and no one’s standing over me? 

Did anybody catch the number of that truck? 

Did I turn off the coffee pot this morning?

Man, I’m glad I took a shower before getting on the bike. I’d hate to meet God smelling like a sewer-rat. 

God. I’m not ready yet. This isn’t how it’s supposed to end for me. I haven’t even proposed to Alecia, yet. 

Maybe it’s not a duck. It looks more like a…goose.

Bike’s probably totalled. I should have gone with Geico.

I probably shouldn’t have left Alecia crying like that. Should have waited. Maybe two seconds. Maybe…

I’m so sleepy. I wonder if I’m dreaming now? I wonder if she’s really right next to me, in bed? I should marry her; make an honest woman of her before it’s too late.

It’s an Eagle! Ha! No wait; it’s changing again. Clouds are stupid.

I deserve a raise, Mr. Berry. You and I both know I’m the best guy on your team. I should tell him that tomorrow.

“Oh no. He’s not gonna make it.”

“I’ve called 911. An ambulance is on the way. Buddy, can you hear me? You’ve been in an accident. Keep your eyes open. Help is on the way. Buddy?”

Why’s this guy miming at me? I can’t hear a word he’s saying.

“D…dude. You’re…blocking…my view, man.”

“What’s he saying?”

“He’s in shock. I can’t tell where he’s bleeding from the most. It’s everywhere.”

“Wait! You hear that? That’s the ambulance!”

“Thank God. Hold on, buddy. Help is almost here. Stay with me.”

He’s got bad teeth. Should probably think about seeing a dentist soon. When was my last appointment? I’ll have to schedule one tomorrow. 

It’s an albatross! Clouds are cool, I guess. Never stopped to consider them before. I’ll have to make time more often. Maybe tomorrow.

“He’s fading fast. What’s taking them so long? I can see the lights from here. Traffic jam down there?”

“I wonder if he’s saved, honey. Should we pray for him?”

C’mon, really? Now some chick is blocking my view! Who are these people? Why are they watching me sleep?

That cloud looks an awful lot like Je-

“No! Stay with me, buddy! Come on, you gotta fight!”

“Honey, he’s gone.”

2 thoughts on “Random Thoughts on Clouds

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